


Teeth made of ash

by Ghelik



Series: The 100 Fics [78]
Category: The 100 (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, F/M, Reunions, Season/Series 06
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-04
Updated: 2019-08-04
Packaged: 2020-07-31 04:09:23
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,857
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20108923
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ghelik/pseuds/Ghelik
Summary: After the battle for Sanctum, Bellamy finds Echo.





	Teeth made of ash

The battle for Sanctum ends with ash blowing in the wind.

Every battle usually does, and the loud drumming of her heart in the quiet that comes after is a reminder that she's still strong enough to pick up her sword, to ride another day, still alive.

Echo stands stock still, watching over the fallen bodies. Some of the primes didn't even have time to rise from the dinner table. Their bodies slumped over their large plates. The dog is still alive: its eyes wild and its panting ragged. It has stopped trying to get up and soon will stop moving altogether.

Echo can't take her eyes off the animal.

Dita's dog looked like this one: long golden hair, and downturned ears. Turtle, that was its name. Echo was terribly scared of it, and her sister used to tease her for it, she remembers. Turtle died trying to defend them. Its panting just like this dog's.

"Echo?"

Bellamy's voice, soft and worried, startles her. His hand on her shoulder is searing.

He's dirty, his shoulders hunched under the weight of yet another massacre.

"Are you ok?" His sad brown eyes search her face, the hand travels down to grasp her biceps, and it burns against the bruise from Ryker's restraints.

_Yes,_ she wants to say_. I am fine. _

No. That's the truth.

No, she hasn't been ok since she saw the new planet hanging outside the observation deck on Eligius' ship. She hasn't been ok since she woke up to a third of her clan being dead. She hasn't been ok since she left the Ring.

Her eyes follow his hand, resting on top of her elbow.

Last time he held her like that - thumb drawing reassuring circles on her skin, his warmth engulfing her whole, making her feel safe- they were about to face his sister. They didn't know they would end up burning the world, traveling to new planets — killing gods.

"Babe?"

_Yes,_ she wants to say_. I am fine. _

"Where were you?" she whispers instead, her voice strangled and broken. It's not her voice; it's Ash's: the voice of a little girl, too scared to look the Queen in the eye. Echo hates that voice, hates how weak she was back then, how inefficient, how disposable.

"Echo, I'm-"

She pulls away.

The whole world seems to tip dangerously, and she is angry and scared and disgusted at the black blood splattered across the room - another insult to everything she's ever held dear.

"I needed you, and you weren't there!"

She feels frayed, on the verge of unraveling, like a poorly knit blanket, and anger is easier to control than fear.

"I was trying to save Clarke. To get Josephine's mid-drive to-" he looks around the room at the slaughtered primes. He sighs, voice trailing off to hang uselessly between them. He looks defeated. "I am so sorry it took me so long to get back."

Echo closes her fists, fingernails digging into the soft flesh of her palms.

She knows. Oh, how she knows why Bellamy wasn't there! But that doesn't make the fear go away.

_The knowledge that soon Echo would die again, and this time there would be nothing left of her. That he would come back to a stranger in her body, that her clan would be wiped from existence, and if she only had been better, been stronger, been smarter they all would have been safe. _

Knowing why and knowing that he was trying to prevent this deicide only serves to complicate things because she cannot be angry, but fear is still threatening to destroy her.

"What happened to you?"

"Nothing."

He looks hurt at her blatant lie, but he doesn't let go of her or look away.

"We can't break the cycle." Bellamy's voice is but a whisper, an agonic plea for help.

The memory of Monty and Harper feels like someone speared her through with a sword.

"At least you got Clarke back."

His hand tightens slightly around her arm, refusing to let go. He still doesn't know about the bruise. He doesn't know about the blood, or the pyres with all their family about to burn - _Don't cry, Ash. If you cry, they'll hear you-_. He doesn't know she failed to protect their people, to pull her part of the plan through. He doesn't know she failed, and the fear is irrational and too much to bear– _weakness is death. Don't disappoint me again. You will shame our clan never again._ _You are banished._

"Echo," Bellamy says, urgent and scared. "What happened?"

The dog has stopped moving.

Echo thinks she hears Dita crying loud and terrified as someone drags her behind the shed, but it's just a distant memory.

"I-"

The black blood on the walls looks like inky smudges.

_Yu laik natblida_, the flamekipa's wonder still echoes in her mind, filling her with disgust_._

"I-"

Words desert her, and in that brightly lit room full of the bodies of her enemies, she shatters, tears rolling down her cheeks like waterfalls. The grief of over ten thousand deaths choking her. She can't breathe. Pain twists her insides, tearing her open, for everyone to see, and it feels like it will never end.

Bellamy doesn't ask, just pulls her close into his strong arms and presses his lips to her head, his voice low as he mumbles sweet nothings into her hair, broad hands drawing soothing circles on her back.

Echo claws at his jacket, pulling him closer, fighting to get air into her lungs, so she might ask for help, or beg for everything to stop, or scream.

When she closes her eyes, she can see the fire that burned her house down, that ignited her land, her world, that almost burned her family again and fear has reared its ugly head, she's staring at its teeth made of ash.

And she can't breathe but hides her face in the crook of Bellamy's neck anyway, so he won't see the shame and the fear and the pain that's destroying her.

After her tears run out, Bellamy guides her kindly back to their quarters. She's exhausted, vaguely aware of someone calling her name as they pass down a street. The room smells of flowers, freshly baked goods and ash, the light streaming in through the window casts everything in soft golds and pinks. She watches entranced as Bellamy sits her on the bed, kneels down and starts undoing the laces on her boots. Careful and slow, his movements telegraphed as he pulls her shoes and her socks off.

There is nothing he can say, so he says nothing, just stands up to pull her short cape off, to gently guide her head onto the pillow and tuck the beautifully knit blanket over her. Echo isn't even sure when she falls asleep only that she's bone tired when she wakes up, anger and pain still there, warping everything in a terrifying cacophony.

In the corner, Bellamy sits on an uncomfortable-looking chair, his shoulders hunched, his eyes downcast.

"I am sorry," he says after a moment. "I messed up."

Echo's mouth feels like it's full of cotton, her tongue dry and uncooperative.

On the bedside table, someone has left a water pitcher and a small glass.

"I know it is science." Bellamy licks his lips, leaning forward like he's wont to do when he's concentrating. "I know you can create black blood in a laboratory and that it's not magic or divine." Anger twists in her gut as she remembers the vehemence in Chancellor Markus Cane's words. "Not blasphemy, science. But it feels blasphemous. It is - wrong. The blood was something special, something sacred. A gift from the Great Spirit of Wisdom, Becca Promheda." Echo brings her legs up to her chest like she hasn't done since she was brought to Queen Nia's palace. "I-"

Bellamy doesn't move, even though he seems to be vibrating with the need to come closer.

"I-"

Echo swallows and looks down to the floor, talking to the tips of his boots is easier than looking him in the eye right now.

"I have failed in everything a person can fail."

"How so?"

The matter-of-factness of his question startles her. She was prepared for his sweet reassurance. This question is one that might have come from King Roan himself.

It is easier, she discovers, to deal with facts, to explain what happened factually: "I failed to protect my people, resulting in them being captured and almost burned alive. I failed to see the signs of a double-crossing. I got captured and failed to free myself and I- I desecrated the Blood."

Bellamy hums.

"Then I guess I failed in everything a person can fail, too."

Echo furrows her brow in confusion. "What?"

"I failed to prevent a massacre; I failed in providing my people with a safe place to stay. Not to mention that I did not protect my people like at all. I was so scared of losing my best friend that I almost lost everyone I love. I failed you as a leader, and as a partner, and there is no changing that now. But-" he rubs his hands absently "the way I see it: we are still alive, and we can do better.

I know I can't convince you that you haven't failed. That you not knowing Ryker was going to change his mind isn't your fault. That someone putting black blood inside you isn't on you. But you have the rest of your life to do better."

Echo feels herself smiling in spite of herself.

"Do better."

He moves, finally, dragging himself across the room, to sit on the edge of the bed. He brushes her hair back from her face. It's dirty and matted, and she should wash it, but Bellamy doesn't seem to mind.

"Hey. We are safe for now, and that too is your fault. You kept us all alive." There is no anger or disgust in his eyes as he tucks her hair behind her ear, caresses the line of her jaw. "You are strong and brave and smart. And-," he licks his lips. "And maybe you weren't born with the blood, but that doesn't mean you're desecrating it. Maybe-," he shrugs. He never quite understood faith. "It doesn't matter, and you don't have to face that alone either."

Echo sighs, molding herself around Bellamy, resting her head on his thigh. Her body is starting to unwind, tensions, and fear slowly ebbing away under his touch.

"I shouldn't have lashed out at you yesterday," she whispers.

"You were right to be disappointed in me."

"I am not. You love too strongly. It's one of the many things I love about you. The truth is, I am scared."

"It's ok. We'll face that together, too."

Echo smiles against his thigh. Her heart isn't trying to break free from her chest anymore, and it feels like everything is going to be ok after all. Maybe not right away, and perhaps tomorrow something terrible will happen, but, as long as he's standing beside her, she'll live to fight another day.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you so much for reading and commenting


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